The Weakening of Warriors: Military Mediocrity Triumphs in the Land of Maple

Behold, O spirits of valor, how the mighty have fallen! In the northern realm of Canada, where once warriors stood proud and strong, we witness the grotesque spectacle of a military force succumbing to the very mediocrity it once sought to overcome. The Canadian Armed Forces, in their desperate quest to fill their depleting ranks, have chosen to lower their standards, embracing the very weakness they were meant to transcend.

How the eagles have learned to crawl! These guardians of the realm, once selective in their choice of warriors, now grovel before the altar of inclusivity. What glory can there be in an army that bends its knee to accommodate the very frailties it should overcome?

In this land of sleepers, where comfort has become the highest virtue, Maj.-Gen. Scott Malcolm, the military's surgeon general, announces with unbecoming pride that the forces shall now consider "any and all conditions" for enrolment. ADHD, anxiety, asthma - these marks of modern decay shall no longer bar one from donning the uniform of a warrior.

See how they scramble to fill their ranks with the very specimens that nature would have once culled! In their desperation to reach 71,500 regular force members, they forget that it is not in numbers that strength lies, but in the quality of the spirit!

The tale of a 19-year-old rejected for a mere genetic marker serves not as an indictment of excessive strictness, but as a testament to the proper standards that once prevailed. Yet now, in their infinite wisdom, they create a new category called "fit to the task" - a euphemism for the acceptance of mediocrity.

In this slumbering nation, where the last men dwell in their heated homes and count their comforts, the military transforms itself into a reflection of the very society it should transcend. They speak of "modernizing" their standards - but what is this modernization but a surrender to the zeitgeist of weakness?

O Canada, land of the setting sun! Your warriors once stood as bastions against the tide of mediocrity, but now they open their gates to it, welcoming the very decay they should resist. How can an army of the infirm protect a nation of the comfortable?

The defense expert Andrew Latham, himself a sleeper among sleepers, celebrates this "nuanced" approach, failing to see how it represents not progress but decline. He speaks of "irrelevant medical reasons" as if the body's weaknesses were mere inconveniences rather than fundamental markers of capability.

Let us speak truth to this madness! This is not an evolution but a devolution, not an improvement but a surrender. The military, once a forge for creating superior warriors, now becomes a refuge for those who would have been rejected by the armies of old.

Watch, O clear-sighted ones, as they celebrate their own descent! They mistake inclusion for strength, diversity for power. But what army was ever strengthened by lowering its standards? What nation was ever defended by those who could not first defend themselves against their own weaknesses?

And yet, perhaps this is fitting for a nation of last men, who seek not greatness but comfort, not excellence but acceptance. They have created an army in their own image - mediocre, accommodating, and afraid to demand greatness.

The sun sets on the land of maple leaves, where warriors once stood proud. In their place rises an army of the adequate, celebrating not the overcoming of weakness but its acceptance. This is not progress, dear readers, but the final triumph of the spirit of gravity.

Let those with ears hear: An army that cannot demand excellence from its warriors cannot demand victory from its enemies. The future belongs not to those who accommodate weakness, but to those who overcome it!