The Dance of Trade Dragons: A Symphony of Mediocrity in the New World Order

Lo, behold the spectacle that unfolds before our eyes! In the great theater of North American commerce, where the mighty dragons of trade twist and writhe in their eternal dance, we witness yet another act in the grand comedy of human mediocrity. Deputy Prime Minister Chrystia Freeland, that messenger of the established order, speaks of "alignment" and "concerns" - such tepid words for what is truly a battle for the soul of commerce!

Hear me, O masses who slumber in the comfort of your democratic illusions! Your leaders speak of "alignment" as if it were virtue, yet what is this alignment but a chain that binds the strong to the weak? The true alignment should be with the stars above, reaching ever higher, ever bolder!

In this land of the sleepers, where the masses drift through their days in blissful ignorance, three nations dance their cautious waltz. Canada and the United States, those self-proclaimed guardians of trade virtue, don their armor against the Chinese dragon's electric chariots. Yet Mexico, that wayward partner in their trinity, opens its gates to the very forces they seek to repel.

How the mighty have fallen! These nations, once proud architects of their destiny, now tremble at the prospect of competition. They erect walls of tariffs - those paper shields of the fearful - to protect their "nascent" industries. As if greatness could ever spring from the soil of protection rather than the harsh winds of challenge!

See how they cower behind their bureaucratic fortifications! The strong do not seek shelter; they welcome the storm! Your electric vehicles, are they not merely newer chains to bind you to your comforts?

And what of Trump, that thundering voice from the south? He speaks of tariffs reaching to the heavens - 200 percent! - as if mere numbers could stem the tide of change. His words echo through the halls of power, promising to protect the weak from their own weakness, to shield the mediocre from the consequences of their mediocrity.

The Ontario Premier, Doug Ford, dreams of a smaller circle, a cozier arrangement between two nations instead of three. How characteristic of these times! When faced with challenge, retreat! When confronted with change, build higher walls!

O you last men, you who seek only comfort and security! Have you forgotten that growth comes from struggle? That strength is forged in the furnace of adversity? Your bilateral dreams are but another pillow upon which to rest your weary heads!

In this grand theater, we see Freeland, that careful dancer, stepping delicately between positions. She shares concerns, she speaks of alignment, she carefully measures each word - the perfect embodiment of diplomatic caution. How the mighty nations have become booking clerks, counting their coins and measuring their tariffs!

The Chinese dragon seeks entry through Mexico's door, while the guardians of North American industry wring their hands in despair. BYD, that herald of change, scouts locations for its Mexican fortress, while the defenders of the old order scramble to fortify their positions.

Behold, O sleepers! While you debate percentages and protocols, the world transforms around you! Your committees and concerns are but shadows on the wall of a greater change!

And so the dance continues, this elaborate performance of power and protection. The masses sleep soundly, dreaming of cheap goods and protected industries, while their leaders weave ever more complex webs of regulation and restriction.

What emerges from this spectacle is a portrait of a continent at war with itself - seeking simultaneously to embrace the future and cling to the past, to welcome change and resist it, to grow stronger by becoming more fearful.

Rise, O you who still have the courage to dream! Let the weak tremble behind their tariff walls! The future belongs not to those who seek shelter, but to those who dare to dance with dragons!

Thus we witness the unfolding of this grand drama, where the spirit of commerce battles against the demons of fear, where the promise of progress wrestles with the comfort of stagnation. And in this battle, let it be known: the victory shall belong not to those who protect, but to those who dare to create.